Sunday, August 14, 2011
A Pickle Portfolio Redux
“The successful candidate
will be energized
by the continuing revolution
in the communications professions.”
Gherkin
Some days I’d like to
turn the world
inside out and shake it
like a rug.
Today is one such day,
but the world will wait
while I sit
on my big blue chair
and eat a pickle.
A garnish,
never a side dish
a pickle will surprise you
every time.
“Successful candidates will speak,
read, and write Japanese very well.
It is not necessary for this candidate
to be Japanese.”
Half Sour Dill
Japanese pickles
are called tsukemono.
They are mystery—
sharp, foreign
and unyielding in repose
on the Japanese pickle plate.
The half sour dill
highly favored in Brooklyn
and Manhattan
is a friendly pickle.
Bright green and vibrant
you will smile
when you taste one.
“The successful candidate
will demonstrate
a pioneering vision
and a collaborative spirit.”
Pickle Jar
The cucumber is suspended
in its bath of brine
indolent and numb
unaware of current events,
unaware of the long term
effects of turmeric, vinegar
and dill.
The pickle has a yellowish
view of the world
which suits me
just fine.
“The successful candidate for this position
will be working with individuals
who have been with the company
for a long time.”
Pickle Day
On International Pickle Day
let us remember Aristotle
who munched them,
Cleopatra, ever radiant
dined on them.
Napoleon insisted on them
for his troops
and offered large rewards
for improvements
in the canning process.
Einstein claimed that
Kosher dills
brought clarity
and you know how that
worked out for him.
“The successful candidate
has been found.
Thank you for your interest
in this position.”
Vats & Barrels
I move among the vats
and barrels
like the tympanist
in the Philharmonic,
secure in my knowledge
of brine and fermentation.
A natural.
Turmeric and dill
fill the air
and rows of wooden barrels
glow golden
in the evening light.
Second shift
at the pickle works
is calm and quiet
and on my breaks
I read the trade magazines.
I sit back and listen
to the gurgle
from the vats and barrels
and sample a dill
from vat #12.
Pickle Haiku
Factory
The happy chatter
of the multi blade machine
slicing cucumbers
Delicatessen
Lunch at the deli–
a half sour dill on the side
so green and happy
Grocery Store
Shelves lined with bright jars
gherkin, dill and bread and butter–
which one for me?
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Famous People
Today I Am Robert Mitchum
Big pants and a fedora,
pockets full of cigarettes.
I'll smoke one every 15 minutes
and no one will complain.
Stained fingers
and nicotine breath
I'll be here
if you need me.
Bobby Fisher & Juliet Prowse
Bobby Fischer and Juliet Prowse
met in heaven
where everything is shiny
and good.
Not having bodies
in the physical realm
their dalliance was spiritual,
exciting none the less.
Bobby couldn't see
her legs
and she couldn't see
his end game.
The Abduction of Hedy Lamarr
We’re in my Auburn
boat-tailed speedster,
Hedy and I.
The mood is moonlight
in Vermont
but the scenery
is California,
ocean views and palm trees.
She is the most
beautiful woman
in the world–
her beauty is devastating,
and I am an expert driver.
I’m taking her
to Mexico
but all she wants
to talk about
is her frequency-hopped
spread spectrum
invention
for which she has
just received
patent #2,292,387.
I listen.
We round a curve
and I accelerate
into the soft blue night
headed for the border.
Franchot Tone Is In
Franchot Tone is in
the waiting room
smoking
which surprises me,
but there he is
with yet another cigarette
going on
about Bette Davis;
“an encyclopedia of nuance,
ethereal and strange”
he said crushing out
his Chesterfield.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
June Work
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Lilac Time
Lilacs in the back yard bloom
another year gone
another trip around the sun
complete.
The hard green buds soon unfold
the perfume rises
and I wobble like a top
every time.
When the lilacs bloom
I’ll leave my room
through the window
like a groom
in a painting by Chagall.
I’ll hesitate just long enough
to call you.
Eight o’clock in the evening
on the ninth of May
on my street
the lilacs shine
like night lights
in the shadows
of the cool green yards.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
From "A Pickle Portfolio"
“The successful candidate
will be energized
by the continuing revolution
in the communications professions.”
Gherkin
Some days I’d like to
turn the world
inside out and shake it
like a rug.
Today is one such day,
but the world will wait
while I sit
on my big blue chair
and eat a pickle.
A garnish,
never a side dish
a pickle will surprise you
every time.
“Successful candidates will speak,
read, and write Japanese very well.
It is not necessary for this candidate
to be Japanese.”
Half Sour Dill
Japanese pickles
are called tsukemono.
They are mystery—
sharp, foreign
and unyielding in repose
on the Japanese pickle plate.
The half sour dill
highly favored in Brooklyn
and Manhattan
is a friendly pickle.
Bright green and vibrant
you will smile
when you taste one.
“The successful candidate
will demonstrate
a pioneering vision
and a collaborative spirit.”
Pickle Jar
The cucumber is suspended
in its bath of brine
indolent and numb
unaware of current events,
unaware of the long term
effects of turmeric, vinegar
and dill.
The pickle has a yellowish
view of the world
which suits me
just fine.
“The successful candidate for this position
will be working with individuals
who have been with the company
for a long time.”
Pickle Day
On International Pickle Day
let us remember Aristotle
who munched them,
Cleopatra, ever radiant
dined on them.
Napoleon insisted on them
for his troops
and offered large rewards
for improvements
in the canning process.
Einstein claimed that
Kosher dills
brought clarity
and you know how that
worked out for him.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
One Of A Kind Books
Here is a selection of new one of a kind books. Each book is made of original paintings or monoprints by Claribel. The covers are also original paintings. Some have a poem by Don Skiles or myself on the title page.
Winter Oak
Winter oak
sleeps now deep
in snow
Soon, it will spring
green
be mighty
in soft summer breezes
sigh its memories
Don Skiles
Tugboat
Tugboats are a special breed.
Stout of heart, broad of beam
they accomplish so much
with a friendly nudge.
A tugboat is brave
and sure of itself–
they never look back or worry
about how big the next ship will be.
The work is hard,
the weather often dreary
but they never relent
or turn away.
I was a tugboat
for many years
so I say this
with conviction.
Mike Heffner
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